VIVE LA FRANCE!

I really needed to update this. It's been way too long since you have heard any words of wisdom coming from my writing desk. I thought it would be appropriate to make another list for you, perhaps tips for college interviews? But I don't have time to force my witty mind to make you laugh. So, instead, I will be giving a little lecture on NATIONAL FRENCH WEEK!
Yes, it starts NOW!

You will hear French prayers, French music, French phrases. You will see French t-shirts, French posters, and smell the sweet scent of French food if you walk by 112A. Now, cough cough, I have heard, especially this year, a huge amount of DERISION aimed at French people. Now, granted, many of the stereotypes (gorgeous fashion great food ruined economy expensive toilets) are actually true, but some are not. So, you racist high schoolers, make fun of us. We are unflappable. Yeah, we're taking a language which isn't especially useful in the day to day sense, but consider:

1) French is the language of love. We have a built-in advantage in seduction. All we have to say is 'Bonjourrr,' and people interpret it as 'I am smart and ridiculously sexy.' HA, Spanish won't do that for you, and German would be more likely to get you a punch in the face.

2) All those amazing novels and poetry? Written by the French. And they're even better when read in French. Camus actually makes slightly more sense!

3) Yeah, it's nice to travel anywhere, but with French you can go to Paris! The city of cities! Or you can go to Vietnam or Africa or Canada! Anywhere your heart desires, your dream will come true.

4)When studying the French Revolution in a class of Spanish speakers (cough AP Euro cough), it gives you the right to make fun of those students and teacher absolutely SLAUGHTERING the French language. I mean, how many ways can you say 'Jacobins' before it is impossible to keep the laughter in. And I am always puzzled with the difficulty with 'Francois'. Granted, my accent is certainly not perfect, but compared to English, French is a walk in the park to pronounce.

5) Finalement, la nourriture! C'est magnifique! Les crepes, la clafoutis, le fromage...So much!

SO. ENJOY THIS WEEK. ALL OF US FRENCH KIDS WILL. AND YOU ARE REQUIRED TO BE HAPPY IF WE ARE.
Believe me, it's rare that you see me smiling in the halls. Enjoy it while it lasts ;)

Here's some laughable points for you:

"Bouillabaisse is only good because cooked by the French, who, if they cared to try, could produce an excellent and nutritious substitute out of cigar stumps and empty matchboxes."

How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb?
One. He holds the bulb and all of Europe revolves around him.

An old saying: Raise your right hand if you like the French.... Raise both hands if you are French.